Vegan Oreo Mud Cake Jar (+ Vegan Egg Replacement)

Cake Jars, the best way to cary a cake on the go. Ok, I'm not sure thats what they were made for but I like that idea!

Ground flaxseed as an egg replacement: 

I got my ground flaxseeds from eBay - here £5.95 for 1kg.

I used 1tbsp ground flax and 3tbsp water for 1 egg, mixed and chilled in fridge for 10 minutes, so do this step first so the mixture can chill while you prepare the cake. 

I just followed the instructions and measurements for water, oil and eggs on the box which required 3 eggs but I think using the flaxseeds in replacement for 3 eggs might have been too much as my cakes were too soft inside, so next time I would only use the equivalent of 2. Or I would just try the cake mix and can of frizzy pop trick, which I hear works great in replacement of the water, oil and eggs and is probably the quickest/simplest method. 

This makes a more of an Oreo mud cake jar which you can dig to the bottom of and get all the delicious flavours but if you are wanting a neater cake jar with more definition between the layers. I made this one below with just even layers of cake and Betty Crocker vanilla icing, I would recommend a smaller jar if you're doing it like that. 

(Cocktail stick decorations were from a New Look bun case set but it would be easy to print something from Pinterest and DIY for a last minutes idea)

Happy Valentine's Day.

Enjoy x

Insragram: vegankmb

Vegan Chinese Style Chicken Curry Recipe

The perfect Chinese take away made from home. Cheap, simple and quick!

Put Quorn vegan chicken pieces in a frying pan, add Mayflower curry sauce powder and water, it has the recommended measures on back of box but I used a little less (75g power & 300ml water) for 2 large portions. 

Bring to boil then add onions, peas, mushrooms and tomatoes, I don't know if tomatoes were made to be put in a Chinese curry but I fancied adding a few, then leave to simmer for 10-15 minutes.

Serve on top of rice and you have a perfect meal (and a kitchen that smells like a Chinese take away!)

Enjoy x

Instagram: vegankmb

Vegan Valentines Peanut Butter Hearts Recipe (3 steps)

The perfect chocolates for valentines day, only 2 ingredients and 3 steps!

I made both peanut butter and biscoff chocolates but you could do one or the other.

•  Melt chocolate in microwave for a couple of minutes, you can add coconut oil to thin the chocolate out but its not a necessary step if you don't already have coconut oil in the cupboard
• Fill moulds half way then leave to set in fridge for 10 minutes

• Add your peanut butter or biscoff on top of the set chocolate 

(I melted the peanut butter and biscoff spread in the microwave with a little coconut oil to make it a easier to pour into moulds but again, not a necessary step)

• Fill the rest of the moulds with melted chocolate (I'm sure yours will be neater than mine ha, I was eager, ok..) and leave to set in the fridge for 30 minutes or put them in the freezer if you can't wait that long!

• Run to the fridge and bust those chocolates out of the moulds!

This recipe is so simple and easy and they are so rich and chocolately that one is enough, so they might actually last you longer than an hour... they might. Enjoy x

Marks & Scars.

I'm always writing about illnesses here on my blog, which is what I set out to do but it turns out that health isn't the only subject I have something to say about, so I thought I could share a little piece of my mind with you, on something I often see people insecure about, incase you needed to hear it.

We're all born with a blank canvas and as we grow our canvas changes, whether they are changes we choose to make ourselves, the mark of a healed wound or natural changes our body makes on it's own. I don't look at any mark on my skin and think that it's ugly, it's just my skin. I actually find the longer I look at the stretch marks, the scars, the freckles and the moles on my skin, the happier I am about them, no one else has that exact pattern on their skin, no one else can look down and see those unique markings that you see on your body and I don't think that is something to be ashamed of. I'm always working to love the parts of me that I spent so long trying to hide by just appreciating why they are there, I have stretch marks because I have grown, I have gained weight, I have lost weight, I have scars because I have had surgery to keep my body going, I have battled a mental illness, I've also done some damaging falling over many times while having fun as a child.

We all get caught up in the magazines from time to time and begin to search for the next thing to help make us that little more perfect but I think thats the thing, perfect is only really possible in magazines, after its been touched by people who have adjusted it to make it their own idea of perfect, even then someone will find a fault. It would be no fun if we all lost those interesting, distinctive features that stitch us together, we would also never get to laugh together over the story of how a shetland pony caused my imperfect looking nose...

This body is keeping my alive, I know I've disliked and felt let down by it at times but it never stopped and my perfectly imperfect skin is protecting all of the important parts, it's keeping me together, I shouldn't even mind what it looks like. I am grateful for the growth in my life and I will happily embrace that showing on my skin. This is the only body we will ever have, how can we waste time feeling anything but love for that?

Tips For Spoonies Abroad. (Preparing, During & Aftermath)

Before you go

Understanding your illness - 

I think the most important thing to know and understand before going away is your illness. I mean, I doubt I'll ever fully understand my illness and what's actually going on with my body but this past year I have become more aware of what my illness is capable of and that's made me understand why certain things happen and prepared me for when a bad day does comes. Paying attention to the way your illness affects you, learning what helps and what doesn't; the things you should avoid and learning to actually listen to your body should make things run a little smoother. 

Company - 

Make sure you're going with people who will respect your limits and understand that you're going to have to approach everything a little different than your 'average healthy person'. From experience on both ends of the spectrum I can confidently say that if you go with the right people everything else will just fall into place, even if you get there and you aren't well enough to leave the room, go with people who understand and they'll respectfully leave you to do what you need to without making you feel bad about it. 

Go somewhere familiar - 

I think going somewhere you've been before is a good idea. I had stayed in the place I went this year a few times before and being able to envision exactly where I was going was really comforting and took a lot of the 'being away from my comfort zone' stress. As soon as I arrived, I could relax straight away, I knew exactly where to go and what to do, I didn't have to worry about finding the local shop or somewhere to eat. Knowing your way 'round the airport, where to get a taxi, the places to go and how to find your way back to the hotel takes a lot of stress off of an already stressful experience.

Don't leave it all till the last minute -

Shopping, packing, printing off boarding your passes and hotel vouchers... Do it over time, don't realise the weekend before you go that you don't have a suitcase (aka don't be me). Don't be afraid to start shopping a year before you go, just make sure everything is prepared early, so you're not putting your health at risk the day before travelling, reserve those spoons!

Stop panicing -

Ok I don't have many tips for this, I was terrified to leave the house on the day of traveling and I threw up all the way to the airport (cute, I know) but I had the best time once I was there. During the panic I just tried to keep the thought of being there in my head, knowing that none of the feelings would matter in a few hours when I'm having dinner chatting to my friends. So if like me, you're in a panic about sending your broken body abroad, I can tell you that if you can just push through the hard part, it's totally worth it. 

During

Don't stop pacing -

I know part of us wants to go a little crazy once we've made it there, it is hard to keep holding yourself back when there's so much you could do but for the sake of tomorrow, take it steady. Maybe you can't do everything you wish but just be grateful for the small things you can do while there and you'll have a jolly good time, whether you're doing some crazy water sports or just sitting under an umbrella on the beach, watching your friends do the crazy stuff. Take extra care on holiday because it's easy for us to say that PEM is worth it at home because we know how to handle it, it's easy to just write off the day and let 10 hot water bottles cuddle you in bed but when you're on holiday, although you could spend the day in bed if you needed to, it would be much nicer to just do a little each day and not over do it all on the first night.

Take a time out -

For me, there came a point in the day where it was all a bit much, a mixture of the heat and just being out in a busier environment overwhelmed me, so I would either go back to the room midday then go meet my friends for lunch a little later or I'd go rest after lunch. I think taking myself out of the situation and just resting each day really helped my body keep up, whenever I felt I was running a bit too low, I would go restore some energy, so I didn't ruin the rest of the day for myself.

Stay out of the sun -

I've never been one to lay out in the sun because I've got that wonderful porcelain skin that likes to fry but I'm extra conscious now that the sun does crazy stuff to my symptoms. As much as heat helps me out in some ways; relaxes my muscles which eases my pain, it really exhausts my body and drops my, already low, blood pressure, which does not do me good, so I just made sure I stayed in the shade, stayed hydrated and listened to my body; going inside when it felt too much. I know we'd all love to rock a nice tan on holiday but I just gave myself a faux glow beforehand and tucked myself under the umbrella, avoiding a bad situation!

Don't drink alcohol -

I don't know if every spoonie out there is intolerant to alcohol but I know most are on medication which shouldn't be mixed with alcohol and seen as we can't get away with much, I'm sure it does affects us all in one way or another. So maybe it seems stupid reminding us not to drink but when my body first had a bad reaction to alcohol, I thought it was just a bad hangover, or a one off, I never related it to my illness, so I kept doing it until I realised the two were related. This may apply more to the people who are going away with friends, its probably easier to decline a drink when you're away with your family but when you're around other drunks, the memory of what it does to you is probably not as clear. I'm use to being sober around drunk people now, I've gotten use to it but I know at first it's hard not to feel like a spare part but no one else is paying attention, so just have fun with being the sober one, being aware of everything you do is not a bad thing. I use to think I could sacrifice a day, dealing with the aftermath for a good night but no, no and no, it's never worth it, we suffer enough from the everyday activities, so if there's ever a chance we can avoid any extra suffering, we gotta take it.

Eat & Stay Hydrated -

Probably the most obvious one but I feel like I had to include it. I would recommend taking some food in your suitcase, I took some trusty cereals and cup a soups, just incase I wasn't able to go out for food or I didn't have an appetite, I would be sure to eat something. I think we all could drink more water than we do on holiday but try to keep a bottle with you at all the times, no matter how many times you'll have to pee in just one hour!

Back home

Worry about the unpacking later -

Drop that suitcase, get into bed and build yourself into a duvet wall! Get all the rest you need while dreaming of the fabulous time you had!! Be proud of yourself; you did it!!

I was going to write more about the holiday itself, more personal, not just about the spoonie side of things though I wasn't sure how informative that would be but if you do want to know more about where I went, what I got up to, how I dealt with anxiety and how I ended up with a tattoo... with all the spoonie struggles and management in-between, please say so because I did try to write a diary while I was there. 

If I do write another post, I'll ask my friends if they're cool with me uploading the video of our holiday, again you'll have to let me know if that's something you think would be interesting to see. The video doesn't relate to what I write on here, just a fun thing I'd add on that would probably show you the bigger side of my personality that doesn't just scream ill person.

Leave me a comment with any spoonie traveling/going away tips of your own and let me know if you want another post. :)

 Happy holiday-ing!!

BLUE SUNDAY 2015 - THANK YOU

Wow. It's 18:30, my Blue Sunday tea party is coming to an end. I'm still sat drinking tea, wrapped in a blanket outside and still overwhelmed. Together with my online and offline donations, we've raised £553.60!! I can't believe it, I cried. Then my mum cried, so my sister cried. There was a lot of joy! Thank you so much to everyone who has donated to this important cause, I can tell you that the ME Association and us as sufferers, are incredibly grateful for every single penny you've kindly given!

Anna has done an amazing job at creating this wonderful event, I hope she's super proud of herself because we all are! Thank you for doing this and giving everyone an opportunity to get involved and raising so much awareness, it's people like you who we need more of.

I want to thank everyone who helped me make the day possible, my friends and family who baked for me and also spread the word, it all meant an awful lot to me.

For the people who asked about my T-Shirt you can buy it HERE 

http://www.meassociation.org.uk/shop/gifts/t-shirts/

This day meant a lot to me as this was the event that I'd heard about last year, the one which encouraged me to get involved and start this blog. Last year I attempted a cake that ended up looking like a Yorkshire pudding and I just had a piece in bed while I joined in online, so the fact that I was able to host my own event and have my family and friends involved this year was amazing and showed how far I'd come in the past 12 months. Thanks again for making all of that possible, Anna!

If you haven't yet donated and you would like to. The Blue Sunday justgiving page is still going and you can find my page here, you can also see all of the other teams amazing success here. I am so proud of everyone who held their own tea party, I know the planning, hosting and the following days aren't easy on us but you all inspired me to get through the day and it was all 200% worth it, I couldn't be happier with how it went!

Thanks again for all the donations, I can't stop thinking about everyone's generosity, the money is going to an amazing cause and I'm so glad you've all been there to see and contribute to that. 

M.E AWARENESS

No ones lives their life expecting it all to change in a matter of weeks, days, minutes. We're all aware that bad things happen in life, we see bad things happen on the news all the time but it's always something we just hear about and we feel sympathy for those people, we say that we wouldn't know what we'd do if that happened to us but we are no different to them, they didn't prepare for their life to change for the worse and they don't know how to handle it either. Bad things happen to everyone at some point in their lives but we live our lives preparing for all the good that we hope to come in our future, life would be sad if we woke up every morning and planned tomorrow as if we were going to be less able than today, we plan and imagine the future in the best way possible because we are told that we can do anything if we really want to and that we've all got plenty of time to do it.

What happens if one morning you wake up and you're no longer able to sit up? How would you feel if one day you were dreaming of traveling the world and doing all the things you wanted to just because you could, then the next day every dream was crushed because your life had changed and you were no longer able to think about the future, you had to watch everyone else around you get excited about life ahead of them while you, after planning hospital appointment after hospital appointment, wondered if you even had a future. How would you feel if suddenly your life came to a holt, you had to stop all of your plans and accept a different path? A path of pain and complications.

I became ill at the beginning of high school, I had just began realising the exciting adventures that were possible in life, me and my friends would talk about what we were going to do after high school, we'd have exciting conversations about holidays and festivals together, I enjoyed school and I thought that my teenage years were going to be so much fun. They weren't. I spent hours in hospitals, I spent days wondering what was happening to my body, my friends would be complaining about their boyfriend issues while I wondered if I was dying. Other days I wondered if I was just imagining it all, people would make me believe I was, make me think I was the problem, that it was my fault that I was suddenly unable to move about and function well.

After years of desperation I found out that I had M.E. The mystery that had taken over my life and changed every aspect of it, Myalgic Encephalomyelitis. A condition that disables myself and millions of others around the world.

M.E, known to some as Chronic Fatigue Syndrome/CFS, is a condition that causes extreme fatigue that does not go away with sleep, sleep is made difficult, insomnia is a big symptom, difficulty getting to sleep, difficulty waking up and disturbed sleeping patterns. Pain is a big symptom too; painful joints, muscles and migraines. Sufferers feel flu symptoms daily, sore throat, headaches, body aches, nausea, irregular temperature, dizziness, painful swollen lymph nodes and palpitations. This condition also delightfully comes with cognitive difficulties such as; poor concentration, short term memory loss, difficultly planning/gathering thoughts, a general feeling of disorientation. Everyones symptoms vary and we all suffer differently but something that is usually guaranteed is that symptoms will worsen after psychical or mental activity. M.E has no cure, we assume its occurs after a viral infection but no one knows too much about it as there isn't a lot of funding.

This condition leaves people bed bound, unable to move or carry out minimal actives such as getting washed. Sufferers are often unable to attend school or work and are left socially isolated and depressed because of their restrictions. Don't be fooled by someone who looks well, a couple of days a month I'll have makeup on and be outside looking well but the following days I will be in bed with my painkillers, unable to sit up.

We all say that our illnesses don't define us but it's often hard for them not to. M.E gets in the way of every aspect of my life, I'm sure you've missed school before because you've been unwell and when you go back you realise that you've missed a lot and there's lots of work for you to do and you don't understand the conversation your friends are now having and it's only been a few days... What if that was every single day for you? Years. Then you'd really be out the loop, you see peoples lives move forward while yours stands still and demands a fight from you.
M.E causes me excruciating pain, it makes my body slow, it makes my breath short, it sometimes makes me lay awake all night crying, it makes my brain fuzzy and it makes others judge. I didn't want this, none of us did, it's not our fault and we shouldn't be treated differently because of it, it's just something we have that's made our paths a little different and yeah, I'm sometimes sad that this may be my forever and the future does scares me but most of the time I'm happy. I'm happy that I'm in this position because I'm the one that understands and I'm lucky enough to be able to voice that. I get to meet incredible people who understand too, who inspire me daily. I had never heard of M.E 6 years ago, I wouldn't be writing this post and raising awareness today if I didn't have this illness. This is now my life, it's not changing anytime soon, so together as M.E sufferers; lets make it our job to do the best we can for us all, to raise the awareness we need and push for the research and acknowledgement we deserve because every single day we are the ones that have to understand this nasty illness a little bit more.

I am also part of Team BLUE SUNDAY for M.E Awareness week. The wonderful Anna and her Blue Sunday event was the thing that inspired me to get involved last year, so I'm happy to be hosting my own tea party for my family and friends this year. You can support me HERE, or text 'KBTP55 *amount you want to fund*' to 70070. Funds go to the ME Association, they are a campaigning UK charity that help support and provide helpful information for people with M.E, they also fund research into the causes and to improve treatment. 

Thank you!

I hope this post found it's way to someone who before had never heard of M.E and that you learnt something from it.