FAKING SLEEP WITH MAKEUP...

Sometimes no matter how little sleep you've had (or not had), you still have to get up and do things. 

When I'm super exhausted the last thing I think about is applying makeup but if I need to leave the house to do something that involves associating with the public.. I like to avoid the ‘are you ok?’ question just because I'm not wearing makeup and my dark under eyes are out in full force that day. As I've talked about before here, people often think the way you look corresponds with the way you feel and as much as that can be a negative thing, sometimes it's good to avoid the questions because of your tired face!

So when I want to look as awake and fresh as possible there are a few things I make sure I do with my makeup. 

POST APPOINTMENT BLUES

Today I'm having those post appointment blues...

Over the past 5 years I have attended plenty of hospital appointments and meetings with different people to discuss 'what's wrong with me', which means I have had to listen to a lot of people telling me things about my body, my life and the limits I have to put on myself. Which is why whenever the day of an appointment comes I don't usually think much about it, I'll wait in the waiting room with no expectations, I know that I'll probably be leaving before long with no new knowledge, no progress and no magical medicine that's going to make everything go away.

I somehow always fool myself into thinking that this time, I'll not be leaving the appointment any more emotionally scared than I was when I arrived but I'm always proved wrong! 

When my Mum is talking to the doctor, for me to sit there hearing others talk about my life, I always think that it's not going to bother me, as if I'm discussing my condition with my family or anyone else, I'm totally fine, I feel accepting about the way my life is now. 

So even though it happens most appointments I still end up feeling a bit shocked when I start to feel myself choke up. Everything they say I've heard before, it's not as if they're telling me some shocking facts that I don't already know, I know that I can't get up in the morning, go out to work like everyone else then sleep that night and then do the same everyday after that.. But there's something about hearing it in from a professional or in a professional environment, like the a doctors office or a career advisers office...that really hits a nerve!

Maybe it's because these are the places you usually go for answers; to find out about all the different options there are to treat your symptoms, to get advice on where your life is going... So when you're hearing the opposite from these people and you leave with no positive outcome, it can be very disheartening. 

(And for me, it leaves me needing a little cry once I'm back in the car)

Let me know how you feel after your hospital appointments.
Do you always think that nothing else someone can say will affect you but it still ends up doing so?
Or has anyone out there become truly invincible to hearing doctors tell them there's nothing they can do, do you manage to leave without wondering what the point is anymore?


It's the next day now and I'm all good, I'm over it and happy with life again.. Though I'm sure if I have another appointment I'll end up back at square one for the day until I realised that yes, things were said out loud but those facts were things I already knew, so nothing has actually changed.

BLACK DRESS DAY FOR SEVERE ME.

Raising awareness for severe M.E. with selfies in black dresses… sounds a great idea! Though I did miss the day… I’m stuck in quite a rough patch at the minute and I wasn’t able to do anything yesterday but I’m sure I can get away with one day late… any day is a good day to raise awareness, right? As I'm a bit late I figured I had to step it up with my photos which may have resulted in them being a little harsh... but it can be a harsh reality.

I read about the black dress selfie campaign here on sallyjustme.blogspot.co.uk, the idea was to raise awareness for the people suffering with severe M.E. by posting a selfie in a black dress on your social media. August 8th, this day would mark the 41st birthday of Sophia Mirza. Sophia sadly lost her life to M.E. in November 2005, at the young age of 32. Many others are suffering in the dark with this terrible condition and are often left with an extremely low quality of life.

Read more about Sophia Mirza's story here 

I myself have suffered with M.E. for the past 4 years and I still don’t fully understand it, I just have my own experiences to go by. And from that I can tell you what a dark, lonely place your world can turn into, feeling trapped in your own body, opening your eyes to see the same four walls, day in day out and having to squint your eyes at the sunlight showing through the gap in your curtains… But not one of my stories could ever touch on the devastation that severe M.E. brings into peoples lives; being ill 100% of the time,being confined in their bed unable to move or function, having to be tube fed, being so hypersensitive that they're unable to see anybody, having their life taken away from them yet still being misunderstood.

Please take a moment to raise some awareness, whether you share this post, retweet a black dress selfie on twitter, write your own blogpost or post your own selfie (a bit late like me)... 

The more people that are aware of this nasty condition, the better!

Know that you're never as alone as you feel.

My Polagram prints!

Hi! 

Just saying a quick hello before my unconscious mind takes over for the night.

Yesterday I received my photo prints from Polagram, which is a great app I discovered through a twitter advertisement! I don't know if this is already a popular thing that I'm a bit late to the party with or if it's a pretty new app but it's really practical for me. Me and my friends, or should I say; me and my friend Sophie enjoy taking photos when we get together but it soon fills up the memory on my phone and I can't go deleting my Kim Kardashian game to clear some space now, can I?... So it make sense for me to print off my photos, so I can clear them off my phone and seen as I'm much better at online shopping than I am 'outdoor shopping', what a delight to hear that I can get my photos developed straight from my phone's camera roll then all I have to do is wait for them to arrive at my door! (It took 1 week)

The photos come with instructions for this origami fox too, adorable.

I ordered my prints in a polaroid style, although there are many other styles to choose from, counting phone cases. Though I'm not one for spending £20 on a phone case but if you are; cute idea!

I am really happy with my photos, they're such good quality and it was really affordable, I'm already ready to order another lot of them!  

If you want to use this app, it can be downloaded on the app store or google play, you can also use my referral code from my order which will give you free credits; free photos!

PGU2HJ91

Happy developing! :)